Lost in Thought

I went to work today and finally made some solid progress on my latest "major project". I was already confident in the success of it, but now I'm really sure it will run smooth. The staff this morning didn't need tons of "babysitting" like some do so that made it much easier.
When I got home, I immediately went to the gym. I went yesterday and finally kick started my gym routine again. I'm really proud of myself. It's been too long since I stayed on a routine. I'm trying to find a good weight sculpting DVD to use at home. I love jogging on the treadmill or hoping on the elliptical machine. It lets me clear my head and relax. My goal is to get back in shape before my trip to CA in a few months. I have to get back in that bikini shape. It's ORANGE COUNTY! I have to hold my own against those beach bunnies.

Nervous...Decisions

I'm really nervous. I'm trying to plan my move away from here. Presently, CA is on the radar, but I'm terrified to get out all the way to the west coast and discover I either cannot afford to live decently on my salary or I end up homesick for my native eastern coast. I guess if I was truly honest with myself, I still really, really want to go home...to Charleston. I have a massive list of pros and cons, but no matter what happens in my life, I always look back to that city. I am taking a trip soon out to CA. I guess I'll see what my heart says when I get there. Maybe I'll fall in love. I've only been to CA once before in my life and it was to San Jose. I didn't get to really see much since it was a wedding. I'm excited to see CA. I'm really hoping to lay eyes on LA since I'll be in the OC area. I'm also planning a trip to Charleston a few months afterward. Maybe a visit after a 7 year hiatus will open my eyes and heart to see what will truly make me happy. Bottom line, I want to make a decision that will finally keep me happy and not put myself in another forced situation that may cause resentment or sadness again.

Martin Scorsese

FINALLY! A lifetime achievement award at the Golden Globes! OVERDUE! I have been a fan of his work since I saw Goodfellas. I then viewed my way through his filmography. His firsts and his latests. I'm dying to see Shutter Island. His work is incredible. The stories riveting, real, and large. It was so overdue when he finally won an Oscar for Best Director for The Departed. The Departed is good, but by no means, his greatest achievement. I think they just knew...he should've already won. I believe it was Jack Nicholson who announced his win. Watching Leonardo DiCaprio and Robert Dinero present him with the Cece Demille Award was perfect. He totally launched both their careers through his films just as Tim Burton, another favorite of mine, launched Johnny Depp's, top notch in my book. The montage of his work during the presentation really made me realize how many of my favorite films were brought to life under his watch. Thank you, Marty.

The Golden Globes

A great year! One of the most entertaining ones in a very, very, very long time. Ricky was hilarious, absolutely hilarious. My two favorite moments from him... 1. Introducing Colin Farrell with the stereotype cracks at Irish men who swear, drink too much, and misbehave. 2. Introducing Mel Gibson with the beer glass and commenting how much he loves his liquor, but here's someone who loves it a bit more. AWESOME!! All of the presenters took the ribbing in stride and even contributed to their own mini roasts. Robert Downey Jr.'s anti-thank you acceptance speech was great. It was really good to see Sandra Bullock and Drew Barrymore win their awards after several nominations each over the years without any wins. Meryl was a shoe-in with two nods in one catagory, but well deserved. I don't follow tv scripted programs anymore, so all the tv awards were beyond me. I haven't seen Avatar or Up In The Air yet, but I evidently need to. I really wanted to see Grey Gardens and Young Victoria...come on DVD!!! All in all, a very entertaining year.

DON'T WEAR FUR!!

PLEASE DON'T WEAR FUR! I have always been against fur as fashion. I think it's unnecessary. I always knew the process was extremely cruel to animals, but to actually watch undercover footage of it is heart breaking, disgusting, and soul wrenching. Those poor, poor animals. I can't even describe what they do without feeling vomit rise in my throat. If you don't know or have been like me and were afraid to actually see it, try. Try to actually watch it. As I said, I was always against it, but I feel my conviction is even stronger. I need to do more than not wear it, I need to voice why I don't. It's awful...no awful doesn't even begin to describe how I feel. If you wouldn't torture your pets, skin them alive, and put their pelts on your back, then please, please don't do it to other animals. It needs to stop. Faux Fur is now being reported as having bits of DOG and WOLF fur mixed in. Don't even wear Faux Fur or Animal Print Cotton! It just perpetuates animals as fashion! Sadly, the fur mills are not just overseas, they are also right here in our own country. Americans torturing these poor creatures right here in FL, CA, and many other states. I cannot get the images out of my head. I look at my sweet cat sleeping at my feet and can't help but cry for all the other cats...YES CATS AND DOGS.. that are brutally murdered each day for some rich hag's purse, coat, hat, or boots. Please say NO TO FUR!

Mona Lisa Smile

I'm watching Mona Lisa Smile. It's one of my favorite films, not only because it's cast with some of my favorite actresses, but because it tackles what the 50s were really like for a young woman. All the oppression and basically brain washing. After WWII, women were sent back to their kitchens and told not to work, but instead to marry and raise a family. Let their husbands rule the nest. During WWII, women were making the decisions and running the stores, factories, and farms. Now they are being told they are not smart enough to do so. Thank goodness the entire generation did not fully buy into it. They pushed back a bit, but their daughters in the 60s and 70s really pushed the women's movements. Without that fight, women today would still not be able to choose to have a career versus a family. The women of the 80s saw some equal pay and pushed women being executives, but they still mostly had to choose career over family. The 90s and today's women are now fighting to prove that they can have the career AND the family. We no longer have to choose.
Unfortunately, down here in the south, culture is still run by 50s thinking...men in charge and women at home pregnant and barefoot. It disgusts me. I am the first woman in my family to break this pattern. I will also be the first to leave the south permanently. I truly love the beauty of the city I was raised in, but cannot love the "values". I am ready to embark on a journey where I can live in a city surrounded with new ideas, free thinking, and most of all...education. Goodbye, Dixie. I'll still visit once in a while, but I will not stay and stand by while more generations of ignorance are raised.

Retail Hell

I have 4 days off from retail hell. I cannot wait to kick back and finally unwind from the Christmas mayhem. I'm sick and tired of needy customers and employees. Whine, whine, whine, whine!! Tired of hearing it! I'm ignoring ALL incoming calls from that place. Instead, I'll be diving into some crafting with my scrapbook projects and cards. I'll also be planning my upcoming vacations this half of the year. Most of all, I'll kick back and do NOTHING. Cheers to a much needed mini vacation!

Life... My Way

My parents met as teens working at McDonalds. My father was a star jock of his backwoods high school in the swamps of SC. My mother was an overachiever from an old blue-blood family, minus the money, at a Catholic School in the big city. Two completely different worlds. They followed what was "expected" of them. "Old south mentality". Get married at 20 and 18. Have first child within 2 years of marriage. Have second child 5 years later. I was later than planned because my brother has a slew of medical issues and they were afraid of another child following suit. Luckily, I'm healthy as a horse...too healthy. I've never broken a bone or sprained anything. No allergies...nothing.

As for me following the "expected" rules of a southern girl...not so much. BIG fail in that department. I did marry as my mother did, at age 18, to my "high school sweetheart", but it ended in divorce a short 4 years later while serving active duty in the AF along side my then husband. After 9/11 and one too many bad calls in my book by the military/government, I left when my contract ended. It took a few years to adjust to civilian life. I ended up rooming with a very good friend until life took him on a new adventure. I met someone soon after. I thought I had it figured out then, but I was wrong. He ended up being a very bad seed. My only regret is that I didn't notice it sooner. After that experience, I took a lot of time for myself. No more thinking of anyone else first. I did what people tend to describe as "soul searching", but I call it "finding and loving myself". I am not the "typical southern girl" longing for husband, kids, and picket fences. I don't have a clock ticking away inside. I never have. Kids do not appeal to me in any fashion. I love my cat. She's my child and the only one I ever want. During my time alone, I discovered that I love to cook, travel, write, and most of all be INDEPENDENT. I love having my own opinions and being able to fully voice them without guilt or rebuke. I even began to enjoy truly being all alone with just my cat. I use to fear eating alone at a restaurant or sitting alone in a movie theater, but now I enjoy the peace and quiet. I take a book or my writing and enjoy a nice meal or go see whatever movie I want, even if it's a chick flick. While enjoying my new lease on life I met someone unexpected. He came out of nowhere and completely changed my view of men. He is like nothing I have ever experienced. He LOVES my independence. It's been over a year and that hasn't diminished like I expected, ya know, the honeymoon phase. He ENCOURAGES me to enjoy life and the things I want to do. He is also a traveler who doesn't want children. How lucky am I? I get to enjoy my life on my terms WITH someone by my side. I'm throwing the expectations and southern rule book out the window! As Frank would say... I'm doing life MY WAY!

Real Housewives of OC

I'm really disappointed with this season of Real Housewives OC. I know they are the original zip code, but they have become very boring and ridiculous after all the years and constant cast changing. The current cast only has one original member, Vicki, who is a fugly biach. The rest of the latest cast is boring or obviously over-acting for the cameras. I'm so done. I'm ready for NY to come back, hopefully minus that model. She was a complete mess. I miss Bethany and Jill. I think Bravo should end the OC series with this season and let them leave before they finally hit the bottom. I'm a bit intrigued by the upcoming DC edition. I wonder how they will be portrayed... stereotype political wives watching their public images or come off as supportive down-to-earth wives. It remains to be seen.
They have editions for Orange Co., CA; Atlanta, GA; NY, NY; and now DC. I wonder what city they should introduce next. Maybe Miami, FL; Dallas, TX; Houston, TX; Chicago, IL.